Reader Question: Hi! I’m really curious about your lifestyle. I’m currently unemployed and I’m having a dilemma of looking for a job that would get me some good sum of money and/or for the sake of having a job. I don’t really know if I’m just depressed of not having one for now but all I know is that I really want to travel and to do some volunteering but I don’t know where to start and I’m scared that It might not work out right for me. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just hoping that you’ll be able to enlighten me. Thanks!
– Ritzel from the Philippines
Unemployment is a cycle. A comfort zone. It’s hard to break free. If you’ve been unemployed once, there’s a possibility that you may go through this again.
Because you already know how it feels and somehow, you’re okay with it. Imagine not waking up early to go to work, braving the traffic of the city, squeezing yourself in the metro rail just to reach the office on time.
Because you always want something. Something is always missing. You can’t stay in one job for a year because as time passes by, you lose interest in what you’re doing. You can’t last sitting on an office chair for 8 hours. Your days become repetitive. Your salary goes to rent, groceries, occasional beer with friends and you’re not saving anything for the vacation in Maldives you’ve been dreaming about.
Because you already know that it’s okay to run to your parents’ home for refuge — free food, delicious home-cooked meals, a break from eating McDonald’s/cup noodles/canned tuna for a month, free rent, free everything! Who doesn’t like that? And when you say, “Mom, give me a month,” she will always say, “Okay, you can stay here for a little while.” Of course, she will. She loves you and she wants what’s best for you. But then, you abused that love and used the give me a month card for 6 months. She gets pissed, tells your father and you’re all fighting in the house. You know what happens after.
You get depressed.
You cry yourself to sleep every night. You question your existence, your skills and your capabilities. Opportunities come but you don’t like them. You say, “This is a good job offer but it’s not for me.” Five job offers and 30 resume revisions later, nothing comes up. You’re left with nothing — not even a waiting list. Your relationship with your parents is in vain, your older siblings are mad at you, your neighbours will look at you like that 28-year-old freeloader daughter/son of (insert your mom’s name here).
Do something about it. Travel.
Go to China and teach English. You can earn up to U$20,000 per year if you do that. You are young. Your body will be okay with a little pollution and dirty street food. Immerse yourself with the 1 billion plus Chinese people. Visit the rural villages of the country, teach in a remote area, see what it feels like to live in China.
Get a working holiday visa in Australia. Be a bartender, a waitress, work for a fast food chain, take whatever is available and don’t feel less about yourself. It’s a “working holiday,” remember? Get used to their Australian accent. Surf in the Gold Coast, go on a road trip to the South of the country, or have a weekend exploring The Great Barrier Reef. Your call. Believe me, you will be able to afford it.
A lot of people don’t believe they can travel if they’re in the medical field but they can. They just don’t know it. Be a nurse in Africa. See how different that side of the world is. Understand that what you are going through is “unemployment” — not hunger nor poverty. Look into those children’s eyes. Though it doesn’t give you the right to feel good about other people’s adversaries, believe me when I say it will stop you from complaining about little things. You will be more compassionate about life.
Be an au-pair in Paris. Learn French. Have a coffee date with your new friends every afternoon. Get drunk at a wine tour — you don’t have to know that you need to spit out the wine after tasting it. Forget how wine tours work. Enjoy your first time. Kiss a random dude passing by the Eiffel Tower. Experience how to live being crazy and careless.
Work online and just go wherever you want. That would be easier. Be a freelance writer, a graphic designer, etc. Any skill that involves using the computer will help you do this.
There are tons of options and all you have to do is ask yourself: What is something I am good at? What is something I really really like doing? It can involve music, arts, literature, medicine, law and the list goes on.
This will also make you realise your strengths and tell yourself, “Well, look at that. I am not a bum after all.”
Oh Trisha, you make it sound like it’s very easy.
Because it is. All you have to do is pack a small bag, take what you need and leave. Oh, you need flight tickets too. If you don’t have money for that, borrow from your parents (Sorry moms and dads). They will be more than grateful you will be doing something different in your life. They will be proud that you’re making a change. If they don’t understand what you want to do, ask them to read this article. My mother wrote this. I am sure they will be enlightened. Be patient in making your parents understand. They’ll come around.Then one day, pay what you owe them. It can take months or years and I don’t care. Pay the money you owe for the air fare. Insist if they say no. Tell them that, “if I don’t pay you, it means that I didn’t succeed with my endeavours in life.”
It’s the best feeling in the world not because of your pride but because you will see that happiness in your mother’s face with all the love in her eyes.
Get out of the unemployment cycle. Travel.
Experience being hungry because you overlooked your expenses. You do that too while you are home anyway. Why not do it in another place?
Know how it feels like to sleep on the streets with other backpackers when hostels are full because of a big music festival.
Get pissed when the overnight bus leaves you because you didn’t make it on time. Have an argument with the ticket lady in another language.
Give yourself a break from paying rent. You will get to experience the feeling of spending your money to something that you really really like doing.
Again, you are young. A little street food won’t hurt. Don’t worry. Your body can adjust.
You will see that leaving your daily hell is the best decision in your 28 years of existence.
So, Ritzel, you said you’re scared that it won’t work out for you. Let me tell you this with all honesty: I don’t know if you will make it when you go out here but one thing, I know for sure: if you really want something, it will all work out. Not because of me, your parents or friends, but because of you.
It’s okay to be scared. That only proves you’re human and living. Where’s the fun in knowing what will happen tomorrow?
You will do it. You will save yourself from the depression of unemployment.
Disclaimer: The letter sender is not 28 years old. In fact, I don’t know how old she is. It’s just the first age that came into my mind while writing this.
Trisha is one of those people who left their comfortable life to travel the world and learn about life. Her style is to stay in one place she likes for 3 months (or more) to know what it feels like to eat, cook, speak, and sleep in another culture that isn’t hers. She’d like to believe she’s not traditionally traveling but she just chooses to be somewhere else all the time. In no particular order, her favorite cities in the world are Barcelona, Buenos Aires, Hong Kong, Mexico City, and Tel Aviv.
Wednesday 1st of February 2017
I couldn't help getting a bit teary-eyed as I finished reading this. I can so relate as I've been in-between jobs for some time and passed up job offers I felt were not for me. And like you said, my relationship with my family is strained that I can't bear to sit down for a meal with them. I was getting used to being looked down on and being a loser.
I didn't know there were others who are going through the same things as I am (I thought I was an anomaly or something) or that there was a way for me to get out of this mess.
Thanks for writing this, it got me thinking that I may be meant to do wonderful things too, just not where I am right now though.
Friday 2nd of October 2015
Speaking of Australia, it's sooo damn hard to get a sponsorship/working visa. Samantalang people from Europe just buy theirs for like $400. I wish PH passport holders have that option too.
Friday 21st of August 2015
Ummm no. What these internet articles SHOULD do is to stop suggesting people what they should do. I.e: posts that're meant to "inspire" by saying "you're missing half of your life if you haven't gone to this or havent done that".
What i'm saying is that not everyone has the same, capable parents who can anytime sponsor flight tickets. Not everyone wants to "break away from the norm". There are people who want to be unemployed to take a rest from the 9-5 and late nights at work if they had it their way Some people look at free time to not do anything (yes, that includes riding planes and bunking in hostels) as luxury. I should know.
PS: the only time i travel is when im on a full-time job. Yes im your typical comfort-zoned type A, but i like it here. A lot.
Wednesday 29th of April 2015
Seems like this article is talking to me. I really love how you write, Trisha.
Friday 3rd of April 2015
I'm so glad I stumbled upon this blog. Totally bookmarking this!
What you do now has been a dream of mine ever since I was in HS. I've always thought travelling and working remotely only happened in movies or TV shows. I mean, I know it looked easy but deep inside I knew it wasn't and that it was only just going to be just that for me, a dream.
After I graduated from college, I promised my self to travel little by little. Explore the country then on to Asia and then who knows. But then I got pregnant and now I'm a mom of a 5-yr old. I still want to travel. A LOT. I still want to backpack my way through different countries in Europe and Latin America, immerse myself in the most secluded places in Asia, do volunteer work, etc.. but I am being held back by my responsibilities. It's depressing sometimes just thinking about it, really.
I still am hoping to do it one day (with my daughter maybe). Your blog has inspired me to work on that dream again. Maybe not in the near future but one day, I will. I must. I have always believed it was my mission in life LOL but thanks for writing about your travel experiences. I love everything in your blog! Truly inspiring.