Dear girls of the world: The truth may hurt a while, but a lie hurts forever

Dear girls of the world,

The truth may hurt a while, but a lie hurts forever; I’ve learned this the hard way. Not too long ago, I was living a lie myself. I majored in computer science in college and worked a corporate job as a software engineer. Deep down I always knew it wasn’t meant for me, but I wasn’t strong enough to accept it. I hated programming, but it brought good income and it sure impressed my parents (and everyone else). I had chased this path for all the wrong reasons and so it made me miserable for years.

Soon after, I started traveling, which changed my entire perspective. Travel has led me to my destined path and has given me the strength to accept myself for who I really am.

“Better to get hurt by the truth than comforted with a lie.” — Khaled Hosseini


I was too afraid to face the truth because it meant destroying the illusions I was living. It meant having to let people down, choosing another major, and prolonging graduation. It was easier to comfort myself with lies and to pretend that everything was fine. But the longer I lied to myself, the deeper hole I was in. I soon found myself stuck in the corporate world where my life was getting sucked out of me. I noticed myself becoming easily irritated, which hurt myself and those around me. The lies were slowly eating at me; I knew I couldn’t ignore my happiness forever.

I soon discovered the beauty of solo travel. Since then, it’s been the number one thing that has allowed me to truly understand myself as a person. Being out of the ordinary and visiting a new place, gave me opportunity to be myself completely. Distancing myself from all the chaos back home had amplified my inner voice. I was finally starting to see things for what they were. I’ve met people who were living their dreams and I’ve noticed these were the happiest kinds of people. They had a sense of who they were and used it to cultivate their passions. I was inspired by the little things I’ve seen and the people I’ve encountered. I eventually mustered the courage to accept my truth.


The moment I accepted that I wasn’t a programmer, the more things started to align in my life. The truth is, I’m a creative person who loves to take pictures, travel, and relate to people. Today I tie all my passions in one through my writings on my blog. This is what gives me fulfillment and meaning in life. I don’t care about money, status, and fame anymore. I care about finding my purpose and sharing my story with others hoping to make their lives even just a teeny bit better.

When you face your truth, you stop wasting time on the wrong things — or in my case, the wrong path in life. A whole set of possibilities will start to open up for you. You will utilize your natural skills to your full potential and create something unique to offer the world. It will make you a happier person (less wrinkles!), creating a ripple effect to those around you. You’ll make room for growth and discover a better and stronger version of yourself in the long run.

So girls, be strong and face the truth head on!

“Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth.” — Buddha

who is on a continuous journey

Carmelisse resides in Las Vegas and is a blogger at Here & Air where she creates content focused on travel, lifestyle, and photography. She recently found the courage to leave her 9-5 corporate job, after realizing the importance of living a wholehearted life of passion and adventure. Her goal is to reach out to an audience who desire to live a better life overall, while inspiring them to travel more often because life is too short! When Carmelisse is not blogging, she is snapping photographs, seeking adventure, doing yoga, and cuddling with her kitties. Follow more of her adventures on Instagram @Carmelisse.


  • February 29, 2016

    This was such the perfect post for me to stumble upon as I just last week gained the courage to quit my job in the corporate world to travel. You go girl!

    • March 4, 2016

      Hi Shane! Great to hear there are more people out there following their passions. Congrats on leaving the cubicle life! Excited for your new journey! 🙂

  • June
    March 3, 2016

    THIS POST IS MADE FOR ME. I’m in my second year of my CPSC program and I just know that this is not the right path for me. But I’m too scared to switch my major because I don’t think I have other options. Like you, I’ve always known I’m more inclined to arts than science. The reason why I chose compsci was because of the job opportunities. Plus, it’s interesting. I took up Game Programming in Grade 12 and it sparked my interest in CPSC. Little did I know that the compsci taught in university was so different from what we did in high school. In my first term of my 2nd year, I had really bad anxiety and I felt like I was falling into depression. I skipped so much labs and homework because every line of code made me feel sick. I still did pretty okay in the course though so I thought I could survive the next term. But turns out, I’m doing the same thing again.

    Just last week I realized that all in my 3rd year I would have to take more compsci courses and the thought made me feel so anxious. I thought about my life after university and how I would be working in front of a computer everyday. That is not how I want to spend my life. So yeah, thank you for writing this post. This is a reminder to me that I am not alone. All my other friends are really serious about compsci and they are already building up their careers. I know that I don’t want to corporate career and I want to have as much freedom as I can get. Whenever I tell people that, they just don’t seem to understand. So thank you for this.

    • March 4, 2016

      Hi June you are definitely not alone. I wanted to do CS because it was the smart and practical thing to do. But oddly enough, it wasn’t the right thing to do. I was getting major anxiety just like you and I was extremely insecure about my work. Everyone else seemed to love what they were doing except me and it really showed through my work. I don’t necessarily think that just because something is difficult, you need to move on. It just means you are getting put to the test. If you can get over those humps, and still love what you’re doing, then you’re on the right path! I don’t want to discourage you from challenging yourself. But in my case, CS in all just wasn’t me. I’ve always been a creative person and that’s something I can’t hide. I think once you figure out who you really are and follow your heart (cliche but very true), you will bring out the best version of yourself and utilize your true potentials. Good luck with everything! 🙂

  • Rose
    March 3, 2016

    This came in so in time as well for me. I quit my corporate job to try my luck in getting a studio photographer job. Never mind the money/status, or the thought of starting over if it means better satisfaction in my life. Thank you so much for this post!

    • March 4, 2016

      Hey Rose! Good for you! You just took a huge step into becoming a happier person! You’re right, don’t worry about the money now. Follow your passions and the money will come. Good luck! 🙂

  • Anja
    March 3, 2016

    Oh my gosh I needed this! I was at the brink of crying (almost let out a watery eye for a few seconds actually) this afternoon because I feel that I’m wasting my life doing something that for me doesn’t make sense. This article is like a call. I prayed to God to help me and here it is. God is good =) Thank you for being His messenger!

  • March 5, 2016

    I can totally relate.. Thanks for sharing such a beautiful post Carmelisse.. I hope I can find my place and purpose in this world too..and I hope soon.. safe travels always dear…x

  • May 24, 2016

    I’m so happy that i found this article!!! Hay. I feel so lost at times, tho i’m still young i really wanna find my purpose and do the things that will make me really happy instead of lying and stuck being miserable 🙁


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P.S. I'm On My Way is a blog by Trisha Velarmino. She didn't
quit her job to travel the world. She made a job out of traveling and you can do it, too.

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